Javelina Airlines
May 14, 1978 – San Manuel, Arizona, USA
“You don’t even have a radio? Aren’t all planes supposed to have a radio?” Neal Bangerly shouted at his new father-in-law. The ground below him was getting farther away and moving in a blur.
“Radios are for when you want folks to find you,” shouted Junie Evans above the wind and engine noise. He smiled mischievously at his son-in-law. “When I’m flying, I don’t want to draw a lot of attention to myself.”
“Why not?”
“Let’s just say the government and me had a misunderstanding. I had a little accident and they took away my license.”
“What kind of accident?”
“The kind when you get too close to the ground. But don’t worry about that. No one’s gonna care if we stay low. We’re not hurting anybody if they don’t know about it.”
“I wish you would have told me all this before I got inside.”
           “Ah, that would have only scared you. Then we couldn’t have had any fun.”
Neal had only been married to Junie’s youngest daughter for a month. He had met his future father-in-law multiple times in Phoenix, but his fiancé had been reluctant to visit Junie at his ranch in southeastern Arizona. Neal could not understand why. When he met Junie in Phoenix, the short old man had been friendly and perfectly likeable. Neal could tell immediately that Junie was rough and tough despite his age and graying hair, which happened to cover most of his body like a fur coat. A visit to Junie’s ranch sounded like a fun adventure.
“He’s a little crazy when he’s out there,” Junie’s daughter had said about her father. “It’s like a different world.”
“How different can it be?” argued Neal. “He’s got running water and electricity, right? It’s not like some primitive country.”
“We’ll go after we’re married,” Neal’s fiancé told him. “I don’t want you backing out on our wedding.”
Neal and his fiancé both laughed but she was stubborn about postponing a visit.
After the honeymoon, when they did finally make it out to the ranch, Neal smiled to himself when he thought about his new wife’s previous embarrassment over a visit. Sure the adobe ranch house was kind of crude, but the place had an authentic, rustic charm. The ranch was only accessible via a dirt road that rose and fell like a roller coaster as it crossed endless dry washes. At night, the only artificial light shone through the ranch house’s small windows. Neal had never looked up and seen so many stars.
           Junie acted hungry for the company. He and Neal spent the first day of the visit driving an army jeep around the desert landscape. Junie was eager to show off his water-well drilling equipment and to cross back and forth between the east and west banks of the shallow San Pedro River. Right before dinner, Junie called for his herd of semi-wild javelinas to gather around the ranch house’s porch. A dozen of the bristle-haired animals came running from the surrounding brush and mesquite trees. At first, Neal thought they were wild pigs but Junie pointed out their tusks and lectured Neal on how javelinas and pigs are not related. He kissed the smallest ones on their wet snouts.
“We’ll try to have a little more fun tomorrow,” Junie told Neal.
“I had fun today,” Neal said in reply. “Don’t do anything special on my account.”
“I think we should check out the airport,” said Junie.
“What’s the airport?”
“You’ll see.”
“Okay. It already sounds fun.” Neal smiled and assumed Junie was talking about an interesting rock formation or maybe some windblown trees.
The next morning, the airport proved to be a flat stretch of dirt carved with a bulldozer next to the river. On one end of the dirt runway sat a sun bleached, single-engine Cessna.
“Does it actually fly?” asked Neal.
“Let’s take a closer look,” replied Junie.
When Neal had gotten into the copilot’s seat, it was supposed to be for an inspection. He was shocked when Junie began flipping switches and the engine turned over.
“No, no! I don’t want to fly! I’m getting out!” yelled Neal.
“We’ll just taxi to the end and back!” called Junie.
The plane started to move before Neal could open his door and jump.
“She really sounds good!” called Junie over the engine as the plane picked up speed. “We might as well take her up for a minute.”
“No! No!” Neal yelled again. That was about the time he noticed the hole in the instrument panel where a radio was supposed to be.
After Junie explained the missing radio and his revoked pilot’s license, Neal did his best to talk them back down to the ground.
“Your daughter’s not going to like this! Come on, let’s turn around and go back to the house!”
“We might as well follow the river for a while since we’re up here!” called Junie. “Relax and enjoy yourself! You’re as safe as in your mother’s arms.”
Neal clutched his seat and took another nervous look at the ground and river below.
“I took one of the javelinas up last week!” shouted Junie. “He went a little crazy! Those little tusks can really cut you when they’re excited! Lucky we were still close to the airport!”
After a few minutes of listening to nothing but engine noise, Neal hoped maybe he was overreacting. Junie seemed to know what he was doing and was obviously toying with his new son-in-law. The quickest way to end the trip was not to act scared or provoked. Neal decided he would try his best to pretend like he was enjoying the flight.
Reflections from the winding river kept flashing from below and then Neal was surprised to see the water up ahead was intersected by a paved road. Junie began a slow left turn and began following the road. He looked over at Neal wearing a sly grin.
“I usually follow these roads when I want to get somewhere! Easier than worrying about a map!” Junie shouted.
           Neal nodded and resisted the urge to say they should turn around. He kept his eyes on the cactus and creosote bushes of the arid landscape. The highway looked hot and dry. A red speck appeared in the distance and got bigger. It turned out to be a small car floating toward them on the pavement.
“Look out there!” Junie cried with excitement after the car had passed beneath them. “You see him? A hitchhiker! I’ll bet he’s hot and thirsty! You done much hitchhiking?”
Neal shook his head and acted disinterested.
“One time I went from Florida to Oregon with just my thumb!” called Junie. “The deserts are the hardest stretches! The sun makes you loco and you’ll do anything for a ride!”
Neal kept staring out the window.
“I got an idea!” shouted Junie. “Let’s drop in and give that guy a ride!”
Neal could not stop his reaction. “No! Are you crazy?”
“Why not?”
“There’s a million reasons why not!”
Junie smiled like a middle-school teenager planning a classroom prank. “We got a tank full of gas and I’ve never flown a hitchhiker anywhere! That guy will be grateful for the rest of his life!”
Junie banked the wings and began circling the road. “All we need is a nice flat spot! You watch for cars!”
Junie flattened out the plane’s wings and lined its nose up with the road. Neal gripped his seat, bit his lip, and stared into the distance for moving specks on the pavement. Junie flew over some bumpy, curved sections and then pointed confidently to a mile-long, straight stretch of road, right in front of the hitchhiker.
“We’ll put her down there!” yelled Junie, “You keep watching for cars!”
The plane dropped in altitude as Junie eased off the throttle. Neal’s view of the road got more shallow but he could swear he saw something yellow in the distance. It was bigger than a sign or a stripe of paint.
“I think a car’s coming!” shouted Neal
“You think or you know?” Junie shouted in reply.
Neal squinted. The yellow thing had gotten bigger. “I know! I know!”
Junie turned his attention from the ground directly below to the straight line of highway in the distance. “I can’t see anything!”
“It’s coming! Don’t land!”
The plane dropped farther and Junie seemed more interested in his instrument panel than the road. They were less than twenty feet from the ground.
“Car! Car!” screamed Neal. Then he realized it was even bigger. “Truck! Truck! Truck!”
Junie finally acknowledged the problem and pulled up on the plane’s yoke. Scenes from Neal’s childhood began to flash in his head as the plane’s wheels clipped the top of the semi-truck’s trailer. Neal’s eyes were closed when he heard the low honk of the truck’s horn behind them.
“Little close!” shouted Junie. “We better try again!”
“No!” screamed Neal, who had stopped pretending not to be terrified.
The plane made a slow circle and lined up again with the road. Neal stared into the distance hoping to see another truck. This time, the horizon stayed empty.
The ground came rushing up to them and then, SCREECH, the plane’s tires hit the pavement. Junie kept moving quickly, right down the middle of the highway. Up ahead, the hitchhiker had stopped to watch the entire scene. He had moved to one side of the road with his bag at his feet and both arms raised to shield his face from the sun.
The plane’s cabin was quieter now that the engine was not working so hard. “So you’re really going to offer to take him wherever he wants to go?” shouted Neal, with less volume than he had needed while they were in the air.
“As long as it’s not too far,” replied Junie. “Mexico would be okay but we couldn’t make it to somewhere like Canada.”
The hitchhiker was standing on Junie’s side of the plane. Before the wheels had even stopped, Junie opened the cabin door.
“Hi there, friend!” shouted Junie. “Where you headed?”
The hitchhiker wore greasy brown pants and a flannel shirt. His beard hung down to his chest. The duffle bag at his feet looked like it had been rescued from a fire. Neal looked backward to the passenger bench seat behind his own. The hitchhiker would be sitting very close. Neal imagined the smell of someone who had been sleeping rough and sweating for days in the sun.
“Heading north!” shouted the hitchhiker, like he was having a casual conversation at a truck stop.
“Well, hop in back! I’ll take you there!” shouted Junie. He turned to look at Neal with satisfaction.
“No thanks!” called the hitchhiker.
“What was that?” yelled Junie.
“I said no thanks!”
“But I said I’d take you anywhere you want to go!”
“And I said no thanks! I’m not that desperate for a ride! I’d rather stay alive!”
Junie’s grin disappeared. “Get in this plane! We went to a lot of trouble for you!”
“No way!” the hitchhiker shouted back. He grabbed his duffle bag and began jogging down the road.
“Do you believe this guy?” Junie shouted at Neal. “You try to do something nice and this is the thanks you get!”
Junie revved the throttle to start the plane moving again. The Cessna followed behind the hitchhiker until he dropped his bag and ran off into the surrounding desert.
“Hitchhikers these days are soft and spoiled! When I was hitchhiking, I wouldn’t have turned down any kind of ride!” yelled Junie. “Offer me a ride on top of a manure truck and I would have taken it!”
Junie brought the plane back to a halt. Neal, who had thoroughly enjoyed the conversation between Junie and the hitchhiker, was busy deciding whether to jump from his side of the plane. If he could befriend the hitchhiker, maybe they could make it back to civilization together. Neal put his fingers on the door handle, but Junie seemed to sense exactly what was happening.
“Better get going while the road’s still clear!” he called and gunned the plane’s engine.
The pavement began whizzing past and Neal knew he had lost his chance for escape. Twenty seconds later, the plane was back in the air.
“Let’s head on back!” shouted Junie.
“Good idea!” shouted Neal.
“Probably for the best! I don’t actually have a full tank of gas!”
“How much have you got?”
“I’m not sure! The gauge is broken!” Junie tapped on one of the dials on the plane’s instrument panel. “But don’t worry! We’ll make it!”
Neal’s temples began to throb and he let out a scream. “We better!”
“And when we get back, I’ve got a mineshaft I wanna show you!” shouted Junie, his sly grin reappearing. “You ever held a stick of dynamite?”
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