April Fool
APRIL FOOL – April 1, 2025 – Omaha, Nebraska, USA
When Josh Laughlin took his latest job, he told his coworkers it was only temporary. He expected to move on to something bigger and better. His new work family – at least that was what they called themselves – was confined to an office suite on the 3rd floor of corporate headquarters. From what Josh could gather, it was the most unimportant part of the building.
Despite their anonymity, the eight other people in the office did their very unglamorous jobs without complaint. Those jobs involved updating reservations and billing information for customers of a large hotel chain. Josh and seven others sat in short cubicles so they could see each other’s heads while they made phone calls or wrote email messages. The group’s manager, Glenn Bland, had the only office with a closing door. They had no official dress code, but Glenn dressed in a frumpy suit every day.
From his first day, Josh complained about being bored. He turned to Oliver, his colleague in an adjoining cubicle, and asked, “Does it bother you that we don’t have any natural light?”
“I guess I’m used to it.”
“It reminds me of a biology class I had in a basement. I had to fight to stay awake. I used to look at the clock the whole time.”
Oliver did not act sympathetic and simply replied, “If you keep busy, time will seem to go faster.”
Josh said something under his breath about wanting to enjoy his time on earth. By the end of his first week, he referred to his officemates as drones. He used the term in casual conversations or when making general announcements such as, “Listen up, drones! The elevator is skipping the third floor again. I pressed the button and it took me right to the fourth.”
The fact that none of them seemed to care when he called them drones made Josh think it was his obligation to liven up the place. He told himself, “If I leave it like it is, I’ll die in my chair of boredom before I can find another job.”
For Josh, “livening things up” meant pulling practical jokes, something he had loved doing in school but never tried in a professional setting. After binge watching all episodes of the TV show The Office, he decided to start with one of the first pranks from the show. He snuck Melissa’s stapler out of her cubicle and spent the evening setting it inside a green Jell-O mold. He giddily arrived before everyone else the next morning and left the Jell-O encased stapler next to Melissa’s computer.
“There’s something strange on my desk,” Melissa announced after arriving to her cubicle.
The entire group shuffled over to look. Melissa poked at the mold and watched it wiggle. “I think it’s Jell-O.”
Julianne said, “Is that a stapler inside? Why would anyone put a stapler in Jell-O?”
Melissa searched around her space before saying, “I think that’s my stapler.”
Josh could no longer hold back his laughter. “It’s a joke, guys. Like on The Office.”
No one seemed to know what he was talking about.
“Come on, it’s funny because it’s so stupid. Don’t you get it? Where’s your sense of humor?”
“How do I get my stapler back?” Melissa asked.
Josh pushed through the crowd of coworkers and shoved his hand through the Jell-O to pull out the stapler. “Here. I rescued it.”
“But it’s covered in Jell-O.”
Josh shook his head before walking to the bathroom with the stapler and rinsing off any remnants of Jell-O bits. All Glenn, the manager, had to say about it was, “Strange thing to do with Jell-O.”
The prank left Josh feeling surprised and a little disgusted over the cluelessness of his colleagues. He was embarrassed to be sitting in the same room with them, doing the same job. When he began a regular assault of jokes and pranks, it was both to loosen everyone up and to punish them for being so blah and uninteresting. Sometimes he only did little things that took little planning, like moving trash cans around or hiding lunches stored in the breakroom’s refrigerator. Other pranks required planning and more childishness, like when he set off a stink bomb in the women’s bathroom or set water dripping from the ceiling onto Oliver’s head.
Plenty of Josh’s jokes could be classified as cruel and uncomfortable. Julianne was overweight and he chose to remove some of the bolts from her chair so that it collapsed when she sat on it. When he saw that Bree seemed especially friendly toward Keon, Josh had flowers delivered to Bree that were supposedly from Keon. The message on the flowers read, “I love you.”
Everyone else stared in shock over the collapsed chair and flower delivery. Josh cracked up and kept asking, “Where’s your sense of humor? Don’t you guys think anything’s funny?”
As Bree and Keon looked awkwardly at each other and the flowers, Oliver whispered to Josh, “Keon’s already engaged to someone else.”
“That makes it even funnier,” Josh replied through his laughter. “I don’t know what it’s going to take to make you crack a smile.”
For his part, Josh’s immediate boss, Glenn, mostly acted confused. Rather than condemn Josh or ask him to stop the pranks, he typically said, “I can’t understand why you would do that.”
“Because it’s funny,” Josh inevitably replied.
“And that makes it worth doing?”
“Yes. You’d understand if you had a sense of humor.”
Glenn did not attempt to argue or disagree and seemed to accept Josh’s assessment.
For weeks, Josh held the office in fear. Everyone worried whether they would be his next victim and what he might pull. As April approached, he made no secret that he planned something special for April Fool’s Day. He loved overhearing whispered conversations between cubicles over what might be coming.
“Maybe it would be better if I stayed home,” Bree said to Melissa.
“I wonder if he’s planning to get only one person or all of us,” Melissa said to Julianne.
During staff meetings, Josh amused himself by staring intimidatingly at each of his coworkers. When they caught his eye, he smirked like some devious plan was scrolling through his head.
When April 1st did anxiously arrive, to their credit, everyone in the office showed up for work. Bree and Oliver brought changes of clothing in case Josh’s anticipated prank turned messy. After arriving for work, they immediately checked around their cubicles for anything fishy. But every potted plant and computer screen appeared normal. When they logged into their computers and checked their messages, nothing unusual appeared.
Josh rotated slowly in his chair with an ultra-smug look on his face.
“What did you do? Just tell us,” Melissa pleaded.
“Me? Nothing. Why are you all looking at me?”
“Is it something in the lunchroom? The air vents?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m just here to work.” Josh clicked on his computer mouse while keeping a satisfied eye on his nervous neighbors.
Glenn arrived later than usual wearing one of his wrinkled suits. He walked directly to his office and closed the door. Josh swiveled in his chair so that he was staring at Glenn through a window next to the office door. The seven other employees in cubicles followed Josh’s eyes to Glenn. They pretended to be reading customer messages, but their real attention was on their boss’s office.
Glenn sat down behind his desk and reached for a stack of envelopes in front of him. They had not been there when he left the day before. Josh suppressed a giggle as he watched Glenn remove and read a letter from each envelope. To Josh’s surprise, Glenn did not stand up and march toward the cubicles. Instead, he picked up his phone and began what looked like a very serious conversation. He hung up the phone, fiddled with his computer, and picked up the phone again. When he finally emerged from his office, he was holding all the letters contained in the envelopes.
“May I have your attention?” Glenn announced in a voice much louder than he typically used. “If you’re on a customer call, please ask if you can call them back. This is obviously very urgent.”
Josh held his hand over his mouth to keep from busting up while everyone else pretended to end interactions with customers.
“I’ve read all your letters,” Glenn continued. “I’m very disappointed, but I’m moving forward with your requests.”
“What do you mean? What requests?” Oliver asked.
“Your letters all say you are resigning effective immediately and clearly outline what you hate about this place.”
Josh could no longer hold in a belly laugh as everyone else in the cubicles shouted some variation of, “I didn’t write a letter!”
“I don’t understand. Then where did these come from?” Glenn asked, holding up the letters.
“I did it!” Josh crowed. “I waited until you left yesterday and put them all on your desk. It’s an April Fool’s joke.” He turned around the room and added, “Come on. At least one of you has to think it’s funny.”
Glenn’s mouth hung open in what looked like fright. “I uh. . . well, I wish I would have known that. I already talked to human resources. They’ve started the paperwork for your terminations.”
The room erupted in protest with people yelling, “I didn’t quit!” and “You have to fix it!”
Josh raised his arms to try and calm everyone down. “Just call HR back and tell them it was a mistake. They can’t possibly be fast enough to do any real damage. This isn’t going to be a big deal.”
Glenn returned to his office and shut the door. He picked up the phone for what looked like another very serious conversation.
“You shouldn’t be messing with people’s lives!” Melissa shouted at Josh. “I need this job.”
“And I happen to like my job!” Keon yelled. “You may think it’s beneath you to be here, but I want to stay.”
“Okay, relax,” Josh replied in a nervous voice. “Everything’s going to be fine. No one’s going to lose their jobs over a little joke.”
They all stared anxiously as Glenn stayed on the phone. When he finally stopped talking and emerged from his office, he remained agitated.
“The good news is I called and stopped the paperwork for almost everyone. The bad news is that it went through for one person.” Glenn turned to Josh and said, “I gave them your name first so that’s where they started. They said it’s already in the system and can’t be reversed. You’ll have to reapply for the job if you want to stay.”
While the others in the room sighed with relief, Josh’s cool suddenly melted like an ice cube on a radiator. “You’re kidding around, aren’t you?” he said to Glenn, but as the words came out, he remembered how many times Glenn had proven he was incapable of kidding around. “It’s not fair it’s just me. Didn’t you explain it was all a mistake? An April Fool’s joke?”
“I told them, but they said they had rules.”
“Come on, I need this job!” Josh cried, forgetting any embarrassment he should have felt. “I may act like I don’t like it, but I do. And the company’s in a hiring freeze. I can’t just reapply and hope to get it back. Please, Glenn, call them back. There has to be something you can do. I’m sorry. I totally messed up.”
The rest of the office remained quietly frozen as Glenn frowned and sadly shook his head. “It’s my fault too. Like you’ve said a million times, I can’t tell when something’s a joke. I’ll try calling them back and maybe begging this time.”
“Can I listen?” Josh asked pitifully.
“Sure.”
Glenn returned to his office and did not shut the door. Josh, and everyone else from the cubicles, gathered around the doorframe to eavesdrop on his conversation. Glenn picked up his phone, dialed some numbers, and listened.
“Hello Brooke, this is Glenn Bland again. I know we talked about this before, but this time I’m begging you. You’ve just got to pull back that resignation action. It would be a personal favor to me. I’m willing to stick my neck out on this one. Please.” Glenn stopped talking and listened. Every once in a while, he muttered an “uh huh” or an “I see.” Then he hung up and looked over at Josh.
“What did she say?”
Glenn sighed and replied flatly, “I’m afraid it’s bad news.”
“What? I can’t believe this!” Josh cried.
From nowhere, Glenn broke into the first big smile Josh had seen him wear. “Yeah, she said, ‘April Fools!’”
“I don’t understand. What do you mean?”
“I never called anyone in HR. I made all that up.”
Josh stood there as if shot by a tranquilizer dart. “Come on, where’s your sense of humor?” Glenn added.
Everyone outside Glenn’s office collectively laughed for the first time since Josh had joined the work family. After a few seconds, even Josh managed a weak chuckle.
And that marked the end of his punitive prank campaign. Once he realized the people around him were not as clueless and uninteresting as he thought, he also realized his jokes needed a gentler edge. He only occasionally hid people’s lunches, and when they were found, there was usually a surprise cookie or mini candy bar inside.
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